When Cartman manages to get himself behind the doors of the NSA, he doesn't like what he finds in his personal file. He thinks it's time he told everyone the truth. Meanwhile, Butters finds someone new to listen to his prayers.

The kids are trying to keep their parents from watching graphic sex and violence on television. Now Randy and Sharon's nightly TV routine is interrupted and getting their "Informative Murder Porn" back is a matter of life and death.

Cartman is deeply disturbed by a single person who he sees as a threat to all humanity. He races around the country to put an end to patient zero, the ticking time bomb that is Token.

One of the Goth kids has been sent to a camp for troubled children. When she returns, her friends find her changed in a disturbing way. With their very existence threatened, the Goths have to do something drastic. They are forced to ask the Vamp kids for help.

Ike just isn't himself lately and he and Kyle are growing apart. Kyle goes to the guidance counselor for advice but Mr. Mackey is too busy dealing with the bugs in the school's new integrated technology system to help. Kyle decides to take Ike to a live performance of his favorite show; Yo Gabba Gabba. He hopes it'll make his little brother like him again.

Religious leaders descend upon South Park to witness a Biblical prophecy that has been fulfilled. Cartman and Kyle are the only two at odds as the world embarks upon a thousand years of peace and harmony.

The dark days of winter are coming and that can only mean one thing: the fight to be the first in the mall on Black Friday has begun. The boys prepare to battle the crowds the day after Thanksgiving to get the best deal on the new gaming systems. Meanwhile Randy gets a job working as a mall security guard to help control the insane number of people lining up to take advantage of the official first day of holiday shopping.

The console wars are heating up in South Park. Princess Kenny's betrayal has left Cartman out for revenge. The kids prepare for an epic battle where one faction's favorite gaming device will come out on top. Will Stan and Kyle's friendship survive Black Friday?

Princess Kenny's charm has brought more and more support to the Playstation camp. Cartman and Kyle have not wavered in their loyalty to Xbox. But now, the wait is over. It's time for everyone who has lined up to seize their opportunity for Black Friday sales. It's going to be a bloodbath and only one side will be left standing.

Wendy tries to prove a point about how much pressure little girls feel to look like celebrities. Her latest soapbox issue gets her in trouble with everyone at school. It also gets Clyde a new girlfriend.

One of the boys had been told time and time again about leaving the toilet seat up after he goes to the bathroom, but he didn't listen. His actions have consequences and ultimately result in an unimaginable catastrophe.

Cartman launches a gemstones network show and creates a very lucrative business. Stan searches for the real value of a piece of jewelry that was a gift from his Grandpa. Meanwhile, Cartman's lucrative new business preys upon an extremely vulnerable clientele.

Mankind's evolution begins to accelerate at a rapid and disturbing pace. Concurrently, another species on the planet is exhibiting the same drastic development. Eventually the two species will battle to the death and "Faith Hilling" may be humanity's only hope.

South Park's big Easter egg hunt is in jeopardy when there are rumors of a dangerous beast lurking in the woods nearby. Cartman tries to warn everyone that their lives are at risk if they participate in the egg hunt. No one believes him until he produces video evidence of the mysterious being.

Stan wants to raise awareness about the dangers of bullying by shooting a big dance video. Will he be able to handle the pressure that goes along with the notoriety of taking on such a worthy cause?

The boys are excited to spend a day ziplining in the Colorado Mountains. But high in the Rockys, far from their families, their trip takes a bad turn. Chances of survival are slim. All they can do is wait to be rescued. But will help come too late?

There's a new girl in school and everyone wants to know who she has a crush on. Cartman is especially excited. He's discovered something inside himself that he never knew he had. Now, to make sure nobody gets in the way of true love, it's time for Cartman to finally let someone know exactly how he feels.

As a concerned parent, Randy radically changes the way football is played at South Park Elementary. The new version of the game quickly becomes the nation's most popular sport. One gifted student emerges as a star athlete in Sarcastaball.

Cartman owns up to being fat and decides that driving around on a scooter is his right. Kyle sees that Cartman isn't the only one who finds no shame in his unhealthy lifestyle. Meanwhile, Cartman
discovers he has a rival in America's Sweetheart, Honey Boo Boo.

The man who visits all the homes in South Park every day is now under suspicion. The luxury of having packages delivered to your doorstep is suddenly a threat to every family in the neighborhood. Cartman takes matters into his own hands and signs up for a home security system.

When Butters starts acting out at school, his parents realize it's time to tell him why he's not like all of the other kids. He must travel to a foreign place to learn the ways of his people. It will be a difficult trip for a young boy to make alone so Butters chooses Kenny to travel with him to the distant and secluded island of Hawaii.

The boys are all ready to dress up as their favorite foursome, the Avengers, for Halloween. After months of planning their costumes, at the last minute Randy tells Stan he can't go trick or treating with his friends. Instead, Stan has to pitch in and help his father with a new business venture.

Rocked by the recent news of drug use by a beloved icon, the world is left feeling lost and betrayed. The boys, join with the rest of the nation, and remove their yellow wristbands. Everyone is on board, except for Stan, who just can't seem to cut off his bracelet.

Cartman is hiding something in his bedroom that could change the outcome of the entire election. While Americans innocently plan to go to sleep Tuesday night with the election results counted and a winner announced, Cartman has secretly wrestled control of the Presidential election from the voters.