Ryan ReynoldsVerified account

@VancityReynolds

Introducing people to the version of myself which tested highest in the focus groups.

Uncle Dale's Nephew

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  1. I'm writing a children's book in "all caps" so people know to yell.

  2. Very important announcement courtesy of and the Xmen squad-

  3. We should probably never do this again.

  4. Couldn't help it

  5. It only takes one click to thank world leaders for signing the :

  6. The documentary on The National Parks. Utterly riveting.

  7. Oh NOW we’re being honest? Well FYI, I faked the first 71 orgasms.

  8. Today! Today! On DVD and Blu-ray!

  9. 🚛俺ちゃんのアドトラックが走行開始❗ "世界に1台”の俺ちゃん巨大トラックが完成❗ お披露目には元横綱の曙ちゃんも来てくれたぜ❗ 東京、名古屋、大阪を縦断するので、見かけたら写真を撮って を付けてツイートしてくれ❗

  10. Happy Mother's Day, Mom. Painfully, you gave birth 468 weeks late. I was 9. We were both so happy to be free.

  11. I remain, -- but Civil War was so fucking good. Crisp high fives all around.

  12. Tens of thousands displaced by Fort McMurray Fire. Gov't is matching all donations to: 🇨🇦

  13. Ryan Reynolds and the team really reunited for that erectile dysfunction ad spoof

  14. When somebody starts a sentence, "with all due respect..." it's almost guaranteed they're about to say something shitty.

  15. Rest well, Connor "Bubba" McGrath.

  16. My brother used the word, "fleek" in a sentence, and I had trouble listening to the rest of our relationship.

  17. Don't let age, Mother Nature or groin trauma tell you what to do.

  18. Remember, I was named Ryan long before it never became cool.

  19. History really is biography. I wish I could my entire childhood.

  20. Tip: It's important parents take little "time outs" for themselves too. Even if you feel pretty guilty when you return 14 years later.

  21. . on the red carpet wearing a custom caped gown

  22. Thanks, but I didn't actually say any of this. And Santa Claus IS real. I saw Mommy kissing her.

  23. Like all teenagers, I went on hundreds of dates. With The Bible. She'll be fine!

  24. No5 Bathroom. extras...

  25. Nobody kicked more ass than Lt. Ellen Ripley. Celebrate with

  26. Grab your box of tissues... And let's go home.

  27. Thank god, they've found a way to legislate fun.

  28. Huge day for our Great Green Spinning Chunk of Awesome. Thank you world leaders for taking .

  29. This doesn't usually happen to me.

  30. These features are as special as it gets.

  31. Thank you . 4 more Canadians on the list and you'd have the whole damn country.

  32. My daughter just sneezed into my yawning mouth. Seemed really fucking pleased with herself. Joke's on her. She'll have to bury me someday.

  33. Fox Confirms "Deadpool' Sequel in Progress With , Director Tim Miller

  34. My hands are still growing back, but I'll be damned if I can't take care of my friend,

  35. Thank you for an unforgettable night. Don't care what the doctors say... These two incredibly heavy trophies make gorgeous earrings.

  36. And the winner for Best Comedic Performance is... ! 💥

  37. If you're gonna see Deadpool a 3rd time, let me know when and where. Not asking for me. For my twin brother, Donald.

  38. I'm coming… on Blu-ray MAY 10. Also, non-existent special edition VHS and LaserDisc, 19 years ago.

  39. The DEADPOOL movie and Ep 9, Season 2 of are the best, messiest, most brutal & most fun superhero movies you'll get this year.

  40. I adore the St. Patrick's Day tradition of fighting your whole family on the front lawn after sundown.

  41. When opened, Ryan Reynolds was just 39 years & 4 months old. Today? He's 39 and a half.

  42. Fortunate to meet PM at the White House, to explain my hilarious plan to "take" Alaska.

  43. When opened, Peyton Manning was an active NFL QB.

  44. Happy ! Everyone going to see Deadpool on 3/12 raise your creepy baby hand.

  45. The pen is mightier than the sword. Also, parking a car in someone's living room sends a pretty damn clear message too.

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