Ben Larrison

@benlarrison

Comedy person. Writer. Best friend. |

benlarrison.com
Joined November 2010
58 Photos and videos Photos and videos

Tweets

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  1. Jan 12

    Give a man a Phish, and he'll jam out for a day. Teach a man to phish, and he'll steal your identity.

    3 likes
  2. Jan 12

    Call me old fashioned, by I'm whiskey, sugar, bitters, and a twist of citrus rind.

    1 like
  3. Jan 11

    "I mean, I'm not judging, but..." -People who are absolutely judging

    1 like
  4. Jan 5

    🎶 Mi-a Hamm/ I call myself! 🎶 - someone who's convinced they're Mia Hamm singing Do-Re-Mi

    1 like
  5. Jan 5

    Q: Why didn't George W. Bush buy that hen? A: Because he had no egg-sit strategy.

    1 retweet 1 like
  6. 28 Dec 2015

    named one of 's Weirdest Stories of 2015!

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    The weirdest Chicago news stories of 2015.
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    5 likes
  7. 24 Dec 2015

    My newest website/a Christmas present for Chicago:

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    1 like
  8. 24 Dec 2015

    Happy holidays, Chicago:

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    2 likes
  9. Ben Larrison followed , , and
  10. 22 Dec 2015

    🎶 Oh, the weather outside is frightful/ But the fire is also frightful! 🎶 - A Very Frankenstein Christmas

    3 likes
  11. 22 Dec 2015

    Merry Christmas Eve Eve Eve, !

    3 likes
  12. 17 Dec 2015

    Is it true that if you don't use it* you lose it? *it = self-esteem

  13. 17 Dec 2015

    Hey Martin Shkreli, don't worry: I'll keep safe when you inevitably end up in jail.

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    1 retweet
  14. 16 Dec 2015

    🎶 I'm like a bird, I'll only fly away! 🎶 🎶 I don't know where my bird is. 🎶 🎶 Do you know where my bird is? 🎶

  15. 14 Dec 2015

    "If I don't have any sort of marketing integration with Star Wars, do I even exist?" - Corporate Solipsism

    1 like
  16. 14 Dec 2015

    1. Alone in the handicap stall, crying because your flight was canceled. 2. ...Denny's? Is there a Denny's?

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    Where to eat and drink at Midway International Airport. via
  17. 9 Dec 2015

    Martin Shkreli may own that Wu-Tang album, but I own . Although if he would like to give me $2 million for that...

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    3 likes
  18. 4 Dec 2015

    Super excited to be sitting in at Holy Fuck Comedy Hour tonight at the Annoyance! Midnight! Free! Come!

    1 like
  19. 3 Dec 2015

    Walk into the club like:

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  20. 3 Dec 2015

    Boy, the people who are mad about The Wiz are gonna be PISSED when they find out about the Blue Man Group...

    1 like

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