I RAN FOR PRESIDENT NOW I RUN FOR EXERCISE AND FEAR OF MORTALITY

FALL IS COMING THEN WINTER I COULD HAVE PREVENTED THIS

TO DOGS WE ARE HORRIBLY DISFIGURED DOGS

THANK GOD BICYCLES ARE NOT WEIRD CONTORTED HUMANS

IN ONE SLICE OF HAM IS HOW MANY PIGS? HOW MANY

A BABY PIG IS CALLED A HAMLET—AN ADULT PIG IS ADDRESSED MORE FORMALLY

STILL UNSURE IF I GET TO KEEP BEING A SENATOR

RECENTLY I HAVE HAD MORE TIME TO SPEND WITH MY FAMILY—IT'S HORRIBLE

CANTALOUPE—YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEED TO DO

I HAVE NEVER BEEN SWAYED BY POPULAR OPINION OR CORPORATE INTERESTS—I ALWAYS ATE BUTTER, EVEN WHEN WE WERE TOLD MARGARINE WAS HEALTHIER

I MISS MY SECRET SERVICE—I TOLD THEM EVERYTHING

EARTH IS MOSTLY WATER—OCEAN IS MOST OF THIS

I FIND MYSELF SINGING "EVERYDAY IS A WINDING ROAD"

AS I ATTEMPT TO RESUME LIFE WHERE I LEFT IT—I'M STRUCK BY THE FACT THAT I'VE BEEN YELLING FOR MONTHS

AT THE GROCERY STORE—THE CHECKOUT PERSON ONLY RECOGNIZES ME AS BERNIE SANDERS—NOT THE MAN WHO USED TO COME HERE LATE AFTER WORK FOR YEARS

MADE MY OWN BREAKFAST FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A LONG TIME

NOW I CAN RETURN TO MY MEAL